When I tell you it's not easy being me..
When I tell you it’s not easy being me, I’m being serious. It truly isn’t easy being me. In the past week I have had some interesting episodes of Em’isms. That’s what I shall call them. Seems fitting.
First lets talk about my new car, a 1998 Saturn SW2 which my brother consistently tells me is going to blow. He’s so thoughtful and positive. Positive it’s going to blow. In fact every email sent by him regarding the car mentions this fact. I’ve owned it just shy of a week and well, it hasn’t blown up yet. Much to his disappointment I’m sure, because he can’t say told you so, not that he would so blatantly.
Then I take my friend Pattycake out for a ride in my car. We get to a stop sign and I can’t figure out why every time I try to go it stalls and bucks. After the sixth time and my adamant statement that we would be living in the car at this stop sign, Pattycakes very calmly leaned over and said, “you’re in third gear.” Well hmph. How did that happen? Once I was in the proper gear we continued on the way and I didn’t have to pick who would be eaten first. Although it was probably going to be Lil HJ who kept complaining I was making her car sick. How can I make you car sick, we’re not even moving?? We’ve been at this stupid stop sign for the past week!!
Then comes the dentist appointment on Friday early morning where the dentist won’t be in that day. He had a family emergency. Those happen, I understand completely. No problem rescheduling. I leave there come home and nap for a few hours. Get up go to the bank to cash my paycheck so we can register the new car and we get to the bank the envelope with my paycheck and the new car title is missing. It’s not in my pocketbook. So home we go. I come in the house and tear my house apart looking for it. I call the dentist to see if anyone turned it in to them, as I may have dropped it in their establishment. NO. I then continue to tear apart my house. Actually not yelling at anyone and managing to maintain some semblance of sanity. At 5 or 5:30 PM I decided to go to sleep because it just seemed like the best plan of action. Of course I had already called my work to find out about cancelling my paycheck or stopping payment on it. The registry said I was okay because I had gotten a temporary plate on Monday which would prove ownership, plus our names were already on the back of the title so it would be hard for someone to try to take ownership. With all that done, there was nothing left to do but freak the hell out and well, my stomach was already a seven on the pain scale so to sleep I went.
Saturday morning I was at work and the original owner of the car came in and said hey did you get the car registered yesterday? I said no, funny thing happened on the way to Town Hall. Told him the story and he said your dentist is near Burlington Coat Factory right? I said yeah how did you know? He said because the Air Force Recruiter that is in the same plaza called and said he found my title and left me his name and number. It’s possible my check is in there too. We find out tomorrow morning if he has them both, the title and my paycheck.
Of course being Em, I found a way to blame R for the lost title and paycheck. I said if you had gone to the dentist with me like I asked, you would have noticed the envelope fall from my pocketbook and you would have picked it up and all this could have been prevented. His answer,” Well I knew it was all my fault, I just didn’t know how it was all my fault.”
Just not easy being me.
First lets talk about my new car, a 1998 Saturn SW2 which my brother consistently tells me is going to blow. He’s so thoughtful and positive. Positive it’s going to blow. In fact every email sent by him regarding the car mentions this fact. I’ve owned it just shy of a week and well, it hasn’t blown up yet. Much to his disappointment I’m sure, because he can’t say told you so, not that he would so blatantly.
Then I take my friend Pattycake out for a ride in my car. We get to a stop sign and I can’t figure out why every time I try to go it stalls and bucks. After the sixth time and my adamant statement that we would be living in the car at this stop sign, Pattycakes very calmly leaned over and said, “you’re in third gear.” Well hmph. How did that happen? Once I was in the proper gear we continued on the way and I didn’t have to pick who would be eaten first. Although it was probably going to be Lil HJ who kept complaining I was making her car sick. How can I make you car sick, we’re not even moving?? We’ve been at this stupid stop sign for the past week!!
Then comes the dentist appointment on Friday early morning where the dentist won’t be in that day. He had a family emergency. Those happen, I understand completely. No problem rescheduling. I leave there come home and nap for a few hours. Get up go to the bank to cash my paycheck so we can register the new car and we get to the bank the envelope with my paycheck and the new car title is missing. It’s not in my pocketbook. So home we go. I come in the house and tear my house apart looking for it. I call the dentist to see if anyone turned it in to them, as I may have dropped it in their establishment. NO. I then continue to tear apart my house. Actually not yelling at anyone and managing to maintain some semblance of sanity. At 5 or 5:30 PM I decided to go to sleep because it just seemed like the best plan of action. Of course I had already called my work to find out about cancelling my paycheck or stopping payment on it. The registry said I was okay because I had gotten a temporary plate on Monday which would prove ownership, plus our names were already on the back of the title so it would be hard for someone to try to take ownership. With all that done, there was nothing left to do but freak the hell out and well, my stomach was already a seven on the pain scale so to sleep I went.
Saturday morning I was at work and the original owner of the car came in and said hey did you get the car registered yesterday? I said no, funny thing happened on the way to Town Hall. Told him the story and he said your dentist is near Burlington Coat Factory right? I said yeah how did you know? He said because the Air Force Recruiter that is in the same plaza called and said he found my title and left me his name and number. It’s possible my check is in there too. We find out tomorrow morning if he has them both, the title and my paycheck.
Of course being Em, I found a way to blame R for the lost title and paycheck. I said if you had gone to the dentist with me like I asked, you would have noticed the envelope fall from my pocketbook and you would have picked it up and all this could have been prevented. His answer,” Well I knew it was all my fault, I just didn’t know how it was all my fault.”
Just not easy being me.
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